15 June 2016


Dear the lovely mum on the bus today,

I don't think you'll ever understand how much your little gestures meant to me. Over the past two days my child has become the demon, he's been such a handful and we're not too sure why. Is it the terrible two's? Is it the fact he can sense that change is coming, in the form of a tiny, pink newborn sister? Or is it that he's just a little terror sometimes. I guess when you're two and you're this tiny, little toddler, that doesn't understand that there is a huge world out there, that doesn't only rely on him, it's acceptable to sometimes be a terror.

When we got on the bus today, I had bags of shopping, and shopping on a stroller is the worse scenario ever. There was going to be another couple of buggy's coming on and I panicked and put Lucas into the smallest space, then I realised that they weren't actually getting on. He wanted out, so I attempted to take the bags off the pram, and hoped it wouldn't fall backwards whilst trying to take him out. Sadly I was wrong and I started to struggle.

I quickly got him out and asked him to sit on the nearest seat, the opposite sides "disabled" seats, he had started going over when he changed his mind, panicked and came running back and wanted me to pick him up to cuddle him, no one wanted to stop to not crush him. Between apologising to the other passengers, saving my child from being crushed and holding a stroller thats digging in your bump with the heaviest bags of shopping on it. I was getting a little anxious and could feel my heart start pumping fast, and an anxiety attack was imminent. Thats when you stepped in! You saved me from having a breakdown. The scenario was my own, I bought too much shopping, but what can you do, when you are in desperate need of everything at home, but you were literally my saviour in the moment.

You politely asked if you could touch him and you picked him and placed him on the seat, and spoke to him and tried to calm him down, in his minute of panic, whilst I balanced out my stroller, the best I could. Meanwhile this lady sat in the seats in front of where I placed my pram, and didn't suggest she moved to where Lucas was sat, so we could sit near our pram, to help me out. I finally thought the stress was over, and as the bus turned the corner the pram fell back again, trying to hold a toddler on a seat and pick my pram up is a handful. You stepped in and helped again. I have also failed to mention that you also had your two children in a pram with you. You helped me stand the pram back up again and reassured me that you understood how hard it was to do it on your own. In the sense of a toddler, a stroller and shopping.

The stroller went again, and I moved and crouched in the aisle, whilst Lucas took the seat, that's when finally the lady offered to move, this allowed me to turn the pram around and made it easier and not likely to fall over. You kept reassuring me that you understood that you got it. It made me feel less embarrassed by the eyes of every other person on the bus watching me, judging me, i'm sure.
"Pregnant mum, with no control over her toddler." You made me feel like that's not the case. I have never thanked and apologised to someone so much on a bus before.

Little did you know Lucas has been a little handful over the past couple of days, he's been hitting, kicking, screaming, not listening, just being really hard work and a little help from another mum, and a little bit of care made a massive impact on me today, It's empowering when something so minor can make another mum feel a little less shit. A little gesture can go such a long way. Honestly I cannot thank you enough, it was just moving my child from danger, helping pick up a pram but most of all for just making sure that I didn't feel like a bad mum.

All mum's have bad days and honestly this was the 3rd bad day in a row for Lucas and I, so thank you for being so kind.

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