TWENTY WEEKS PREGNANT | CASPAR RIVER WALTERS

So I’ve not been as on the ball with these pregnancy updates this time! I’ve been really poorly with infection after infection since February, so it’s been a long 2 months and prior to that I was in the first trimester and we all know how lousy that makes you feel! We announced earlier than we ever have this time because i was so poorly with sickness, nausea, exhaustion and my bump just popped with bloat so early on!

This really, really will be our final baby, 4 seems scary but no more scary than 3 but you go 5 and that sounds like a whole new level of scary! You 5+ mamas are a whole new level of amazing. I am really loving being pregnant with this baby boy and it’s so lovely to be able to do this one more time! I love the growing bump, the excitement, etc... even with the global pandemic happening. 

Talking of a global pandemic, that is a little scary because pregnant woman can’t currently be vaccinated unless necessary, my GP won’t even entertain it, she and I agree it’s not worth the risk and for that I am happy to just keep socially distancing, even if Boris says we don’t have to. I will continue to limit my contact with too many people and hold a very small bubble! It’s sad it’s got to be that way but with my recent diagnosis of severe asthma, from basically mild, never really struggled to that and the constant bacteria on my lungs causing infections means I have to be sensible! Anyway, this has effected the pregnancy appointments, Brads only been to one scan, a private one and due to childcare being difficult to get, he cannot come to my 20 week scan next week either! Luckily the midwife comes to the house but again, I tend to send him out with the bigger littles, so I can have my appointment undisturbed and the midwife doesn’t feel secretly uncomfortable with Rufus wanting to give her cars. He means so well! 

The older three are looking forward to Caspar’s arrival! Iris is over the bunk bed thing and I think we’ll get away with not buying her one for a while now as she’s stopped asking! Lucas isn’t as interested but it’s old news for him, he’s done the big sibling thing twice already but I know when Caspar arrives he’ll be amazing as he was the same in the lead up to Iris and Rufus’ births. Rufus is so cute and goes “baby in mummy’s tummy” and taps my belly or lifts up my top! I’m not sure how much he gets really but it’s cute anyway! It’s kinda weird that my baby is going to be a big brother, it felt normal for Lucas to become a big brother as the first child and then Iris was the baby girl of the family when Rufus was born, so it was like ahh, she’ll be my baby girl still but thinking Rufus was going to be our last I’ve always been like “my baby, never grow too quickly” and knowing that he’s getting a little brother is crazy! Lucas and Iris are amazing big siblings, so I am sure they’ll teach Rufus well! Don’t get me wrong they fight majorly but they also love each other so much! The way they both dote on Rufus and if he does something cute they go “awww cute baby” or if he learns something new they both go “good boy Roo! You’re clever” and they just encourage him so much. I’m proud of them! Iris and Lucas fight a little more but it’s because they fight over the TV, tablets or whether they’re playing star wars or marvel! That princess loving daughter of mine will be Queen Anna of arendelle on the millennium Falcon! 

Anyway! I’ve lost a lot of weight this pregnancy! I’ve shrunk in many places and just gained bump! A bit like Rufus’ but more this time. It’s not been intentional of course, I’ve just been so god damn poorly, but I am now being a little cautious of over eating. I don’t restrict and if I’m hungry, I’ll eat but I don’t sit and eat 10 cupcakes or a whole birthday cake or an entire multipack of crisps... yes I’m basically telling you how I survived food wise in my pregnancy with Lucas. 😂

YOU WILL NOT JUST BOUNCE BACK NICOLE! 

Pregnancy is lovely for me and I love birth, like a weirdo! I’ll leave my birth plans for a little later on in the pregnancy, but for now I’m switching off and heading to bed! Any questions about baby, me, pregnancy, etc... just ask away! 

Happy Wednesday and 20 weeks pregnant for me! Yay. 

BABY IS THE SIZE OF: Banana or an axolotl 

IM LOOKING FORWARD TO: Going on medical suspension, I've been so poorly and I need to slow down and relax

MY FAVOURITE MOMENT WAS: Feeling those little movements

I HAVE BEEN FEELING: Poorly, I’ve had an infection which has triggered by asthma to become quite severe and it’s been on going for a while so I’ve been on lots of antibiotics and steroid inhalers.

I HAVE BEEN BUYING FOR BABY: Some second hand clothes from vinted for baby because I refuse to spend £50 on one batch of sleepsuits from next this time when baby will likely poo right through them! 

IM CRAVING: I’ve not really had many cravings this time! Monster munch for a couple of days and fruit and Coca Cola in the early days (coca cola lead me to wee blood I gave myself a nasty UTI) but I am finally getting an appetite back!

IM LOVING: The bump! There’s something about the bump.

I'VE BEEN MEANING TO: slow the heck down! I just don’t ever slow and I’m constantly making myself ill.