9 June 2018


Dear baby number 3,

I still am in disbelief that I am writing this but documenting what is about 90% going to be my last ever pregnancy is something I want to keep documented and special. I still can't believe how much you surprised us. We'd wanted baby number 3 at some point in the future but had decided to wait but you had decided now was the right time and for that i'm so grateful.

Becoming our last baby isn't something that will make you any less special or loved, if anything it will make it extra special in a way. With Lucas I always treated it as something special because the doctors practically wrote him off at 4 weeks and really for someone who was meant to have problems he was a miracle, with Iris I always treated her as special as she was our rainbow baby and I couldn't believe how lucky I was to be pregnant and to have two children was amazing. Then now we're expecting you, our surprise baby, our final piece of the puzzle; you'll complete our family.

The past two months has been full of symptoms, I have been nauseated constantly EVERYDAY! I have had barely any appetite and have had the smallest portions of food and eaten little and not very often. I have been enjoying ice lollies and fruit mostly. My breasts hurt every now and then and i'm exhausted, sooooo exhausted. Work has been hard work, especially as I work nightshifts. Blogging took a back seat so I could focus on Lucas and Iris and keeping you safe.

  • My pregnancy with Lucas consisted of a sickness very occasionally, exhaustion and I ate so much food, so much cake, donuts and sweet things and from what I remember my breasts didn't hurt.
  • My pregnancy with Iris consisted of sickness occasionally but a lot more times than Lucas' pregnancy, I can't remember what my appetite was like but I know I liked melon, lots of melon and my breasts hurt from about a week before my missed period and I was exhausted all the time.
  • My pregnancy with you, I am nauseous but no physical sickness, I am exhausted, I have no appetite and I like fruit (including melon), ice lollies, bacon and barely any other food at all and my boobs only hurt ever so slightly.

That being said, I can't compare this pregnancy with either of my previous pregnancies 100%. I expected to sort of be able to guess your gender down to the fact that I assumed i'd have a similar pregnancy to Lucas' or Iris' as their pregnancies were different and that would give me some Idea on your gender but although it compares to Iris' a bit more with the love of fruit and constant nausea but because I was sick with both Lucas and Iris so I am confused. I guess when they say every pregnancy is different they aren't lying, I really am proof of that.

I am starting to bloat out and getting a little bump which is excited, i've been like this for about 5 weeks and my work trousers don't do up. I have lost weight the scales say over half a stone but my tummy is growing and other places are looking a little better.
On the weight side of things our midwife took my height and weight and said my BMI was 2 over what they'd like and that they'd like me to go for a gestational diabetes test which I declined as in my eyes BMI is outdated, my breasts have grown massively as has my tum and i'm pregnant with my third child and being weighed at 10 weeks pregnant isn't a great time. I said if there was any concerned over glucose in my urine or you looked like you were huge or I had any other signs then i'd of course have it but I feel like 2 over what they'd like isn't cause for concern. BMI is so outdated, I could have breast implants or anything so i'm happy with my decision for now as I don't feel like i'm putting you at risk.

We discussed with the midwife about delivering you at home too and as it stands she can see no reason why I can't. I want to hire a birthing pool and set it up in the dining room part of our lounge next to where our Christmas tree will be placed in December when you're due and I can use hypnobirthing, possibly have Mummy's friend Emily (who's a wonderful doula) and maybe your auntie Maddy can come and see you be born and she's already offered to take your pictures (although i'll have to teach her how to use a canon as she's a nikon traitor - you'll learn this as you grow) and we'll set up cameras to capture your birth, something I didn't even think about with Lucas and didn't get a chance to with Iris as she came to quickly. I want the most relaxed birth with you, with Daddy and who's to say that Lucas and Iris may be able to see you be born (depending how i'm doing) or they will be with your Nanna and Buddha or someone else and then either way they can meet you when you arrive and it will be lovely. (I'll do a separate blog post on my birth plans and go into proper detail in the future, once I've spoken to a consultant midwife as we get closer to the birth)

The first trimester has resulted in my switching off from the world, watching masses of TV series and feeling sorry for myself but it's all totally worth it to finally meet you.

We're so excited to see you grow and see my bump grow and feel you move and get to know you in my tummy for the next 6 months before you arrive in December!
We love you already,