28 May 2016


Looking back, two years ago now, we were eagerly awaiting the arrival of Lucas. He was due to be delivered by c-section on June 20th 2014, due to him being breech.
During my last week of pregnancy with him, I'd had my 36 week scan and review and had been booked in for my section, it was all a little nerve wracking and quite honestly, the scariest thought in the world, at the time.

At 35weeks + 2 days, I remember my bump dropping and everyone saying "mine dropped a month before I had such and such," and "mine went the night before" ect... I was totally overwhelmed and couldn't even begin to think about labour... I had it in my head, he'll be born on section date and i'm gutted i'll never experience the feeling of waking up in the middle of the night, my waters breaking and having to wake Brad up and rush to the hospital. I longed for a natural birth and to just feel the contraction pain. I guess when you have no control over your delivery and you're straight away booked in for a section, with no hope of a natural delivery, it makes you want a natural birth more than ever. Crazy, right?

Little did I know at 36weeks + 2 days , a quick call to the obstetric unit about an extremely itchy tummy and a quick "come in for us to take your blood and you'll be on your way home" trip was going to turn into something a little more scarier.
On arrival, we had my blood pressure taken; it was 130/85, all normal. I had the blood test done and then it all started.
"Can you do a urine sample quick before you go?" Maybe after a drink. Two full jugs of water later and I could only manage dribble... Alarm bells were ringing. Blood pressure was taken again, and no more than 20 minutes later and it had shot up to 148/101. Then when I finally managed to fill up a pot, it contained protein. My legs then randomly started shaking and I was given a tablet to bring my blood pressure down, which worked.

Finally we were discharged at 3am, and then asked to come back for 11:30am to be tested again.
The blood pressure tablets had worked and I was to continue them, take it easy and come back in a couple of days time. As we were leaving, we saw the tiniest baby in the lift and I all I could say was "I want our baby now," and then wrote a Facebook status about it... Little did I know.

That night we watched a DVD about breastfeeding and I had planned my next day out; Wash my hair and shower before the midwife comes and then unpack and repack the hospital bag to check we have EVERYTHING we need. We had an early night that night due to the late night and early start that day. 3amish I woke up and remember going to the toilet, getting back in bed and thinking 'I'm dribbling, better go stop myself before I wee in the bed, I love pregnancy, so glamourous' and as I stood up the biggest gush hit the floor...

My baby was on his way and he was the wrong way round.

Luckily he was born via c-section at 10:17am and weighed 6lbs 5ozs. He was utterly perfect and still is.
I still can't quite believe that all of that was two years ago, and my tiny, little, inpatient newborn, is now a fun, energetic, hilarious toddler with the best personality and character I could ask for. 
We have grown together, whenever he grows, I grow as a mother too. I learn as he does. We both make mistakes and we're both by no means perfect. No mother is perfect, no father is perfect and no child is "perfect" but to you, they're the most perfect they can be. 

I sit and wonder what he'll be when he grows up with his brilliant characteristics. All I know is whatever it is, if it makes him happy, then its the right path to take.
I cannot imagine him as small and squishy as he was in these newborn photos, and the amount of cuddles we shared together, but I live for his spontaneous hugs and kisses now. Nothing beats a child choosing to come and cuddle and kiss you. Nothing. Although I do enjoy the newborn stage and look forward to doing it again.

Once he was 0, then he was 1 and now he's about to be 2 and every year that ticks by, so fast and perfectly, I am extremely grateful to be going by these years with Lucas in them. Being a mum for two years is crazy, but being Lucas' mum for two years has been absolutely wonderful.

They grow up so fast but they are so fun and wise.