16 May 2016


Dear Little Lucas,

So it's official, mummy was wrong. Mummy thought you were going to be having a little brother. I was ready to get out your old clothes out wash them all and had all these images in my head of you and your little brother playing with all your toys and causing mischief. So it's strange for me to now be only reusing a small fraction of your clothes, and imaging you rocking your little sister, and playing with her and showing her to eat her dinner and how to walk and when she's rocking in your car walker and splashing in the bath, helping her get up to more trouble together.

I am writing to you to talk about your promotion. You're obviously being promoted to big brother and I adore the fact that you're convinced that your sister is in your tummy as well as mine, the fact you know her by her name, although you've only just cracked "Iris" as for a while it was Isis... um, im sure everyone is glad you're not going to be walking around mothercare saying isis.
You're going to be an amazing big brother and you're very proud.
Watching you in the scan was really cute, you were waving at her and saying "baby" and when daddy and mummy were holding hands during the scan you held daddy's thumb. My favourite part was when she'd finished the scan and you said "oh dear" and waved and said "bye bye."

When Iris arrives, I promise you that you won't be loved any less, I always wondered when I found out I was expecting you how I would love another child as much, because I fell in love instantly with your little image on that ultrasound screen, then seeing your sister on the screen I was filled with the same instant love and fear, after losing your last sibling, even though they never fully turned into a sibling I realised how wrong I was to feel like that and how I knew there will always be enough room in my heart for another sibling. This is a proper sibling and after expecting to have all boys, and you having brothers, I could just imagine a house of fighting, smelly boys. Instead now you're going to be that protective big brother, making sure her boyfriends or girlfriends are the right ones for her. She'll probably fancy your friends though so be prepared for that, and she may annoy you when they're around too.

I know you're going to be amazing and I promise to divide my time equally between you both, the best I can, although in the first few months I cannot promise you won't spend a lot of time with Nanna and Pappa Carr, while mummy bonds with Iris, and breastfeeds. Especially if I have another C-section and I need time to recover, but I know you love spending time with them so that will be okay.
I promise to use the time before she's born to have lots of fun with you and your daddy and then I look forward to lots of fun after she's born! With halloween and christmas, I cannot wait. Mummy won't even pretend to say she's not excited about a halloween photoshoot and a christmas photoshoot with both of you! Mummy is a sucker for photographs, we can go on autumn walks too, collecting pine cones and conkers and can have a bonfire in the back garden and toast marshmellows, while she sleeps by the back door in her snuzpod.

Being a big brother is a very important job, just as much as an important job as being a little sister. You both have lots of different jobs involved. She will cry lots, poop lots, and as she gets older she will steal your toys and food, but I promise she will absolutely LOVE her big brother and I promise you will absolutely love your little sister. I am very proud of you as I always have been with how wonderful you are and how well you're growing and developing. I love how much you talk and i'm sure we'll have to buy Iris earplugs instead of you for all the jabbering you're going to do to her.
My heart also melts at the thought of when you both meet for the first time, and when you feel her kick you for the first time. Oh it makes me so excited.

Be a wonderful human Lucas,
I love you lots